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Can you be sure that Col won’t talk about this – even inadvertently at school or with his other friends?”“If I tell him not to, I know I can trust him.”“What about Mutti Frida – will she talk about it to her friends?”“No.”My mother gave me a penetrating look. “You seem very sure of yourself about this.”I tried to imbue my voice with certainty about this. “I am.”My mother sat looking at me for a while. “Can I ask why you are so sure that they will keep our secrets?”I wasn’t sure how I could answer this. I certainly couldn’t tell her that they had trusted me with far more important secrets and Col had stayed silent about my suicide attempts. I could see my mother trying to divine my thoughts from my face. I remembered reading that the best way to answer a question you weren’t sure how to answer was to ask a question back.“How many people do you think Mutti Frida has trusted with her experiences in Ravensbrück?”My mother gave a sharp intake of breath.“I didn’t know that!”“You don’t. You just drop it and whether that’s self-confidence, or you want to hide the fact you just snapped someone, I find that so intriguing. I see the art in your pictures. When you first showed me your credential and told me what you did I took you as a voyeur. But looking at the things you’ve shown me, I know you’re not. Those shots of couples staring off into the horizon seems so simple, but when you edit the surrounding and get just them in the shot it softens and I understand what they might be thinking and they’re always holding hands, or arm in arm, or hands on each other’s butt. You can feel the affection and love they have.” She said pouring out her heart to me.“Wow, you given “us” more thought than I imagined.” I started to say in response to her lengthy evaluation of me, of us, but she interrupted my thought process.“What’s that I feel behind me, pressing between my ass.” She said reaching behind her and grabbing my erection through my thin cotton “driving pants”.While stroking.
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