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Tossing and turning, my mind just seemed like it wouldn't shut off. I just couldn't stop thinking about him.Brian was my boyfriend of seven years, and I couldn't get him off of my mind. I loved him dearly but I was starting to feel that after a sexless seven years, he was starting to fall out of love with me. You see, we are both practicing Mormons, and we both agreed that we wouldn't have sex until marriage.I am still a virgin, and I believe that he is too, but I know how men are especially once they start masturbating and get a feel for that orgasm. I am starting to feel the same way, but I feel as long as I still have an intact hymen, and no man has entered me, I won't be tempted to have sex. But that doesn't mean that I haven't and don't masturbate.My cousin's favorite line is "no one can love you like you can!" And if I may, I fully agree with her. I love the feeling that clitoral orgasms give. I love the way tremors rack my body until I almost black out in euphoria, and I know. You are very grateful. Don't say it. Show me. Turn your life around. Be the person you have the potential to be."I shook my head. I reached up and took his hand in mine. I touched my forehead to it. How could I not say it?! How could I accept all that he has done for me and my daughter and not say something?!I tilted my head up, kissed his hand and with tears running down my cheeks I said, "You have already turned my life around. You won't be sorry. I would do anything for you. I don't understand this. I don't understand any of this. We stole from you and you pay us back this way! Are you some kind of god?"He smiled and exclaimed, "It's a car for Christ's sake!" No! I mean yes! It's a car. And it's clothes and a place to live and food. It's my daughter back in school and smiling! And a computer! She's never had a computer to do her schoolwork on."I haven't seen Erin smile in years! It's the opportunity you are giving us, which I promise you both of us are going to make something of..
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