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All I have are words. And yet these words have reached somewhere deep inside me and touched a place never realized. The witty banter… the sexual innuendo… the subtle erotica. Heh… her words, that are so true. Eagerly awaiting each reply that forces me to look further into myself, to see and feel and think about possibilities never imagined. How has she done this to me with mere words? The immediate understanding between us? The words. The very act of writing. The writing is our safe little world, where there are no constraints. Our little secret. To have a collaborator, so intimate. Like whispering in each others ears. We awaken these things in each other. Hers, lost and now found through my words. Mine uncovered, like curtains being drawn back and revealing what was always there but hidden. Sweet and gentle discovery! Sudden and intense rediscovery! We have our secret, safe place. Outside of it, we go through our lives. Never to meet, never to look into each others eyes. It need. “Kara -- are you all right?”“Physically, I’m fine -- I’m getting over it. I’m feeling better and better as the day progresses. I’m absolutely raw inside emotionally, Adam. I feel like there’s a hole in my heart -- I’m grieving for that embryo. I didn’t expect to feel this way. I’m struggling to deal with it.”“Well ... I feel like I have a hole in my heart, too.”“Really? I wouldn’t have known.”“Kara -- I think you externalize your emotions while I internalize them. Believe me, I feel it, too. What’s done is done and we need to move forward.”“I know. I’m trying, Adam.”“I love you, Kara.”“I know.”“Do you not love me anymore?” he asked.“I still love you, Adam. I’m just working through things.”Their server brought their meals. Kara tasted her sandwich. “This is really good,” she said.“They do a good job here.”“I really needed this,” she said. “I think I was becoming hypo-glycemic toward the end. My hands were beginning to tremble.”“Not a good thing when you’re running a chop saw.”Their.
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