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I was so turned on. Not out of control exactly but nearly. I scared myself, I guess. And afterwards – well, I just felt awful.”“It sound like you did exactly the right thing, then. Sometimes I think that tops need a safe word too.”“I didn’t mean to upset Lionel, it really wasn’t his fault. It was just that I was rougher than I ever thought I could be. And, well,...”“And...”“Well, I made use of him. Grabbed him and just, well, used his face. He must have been shocked.”“Possibly. But I suspect that he was as excited by it as you were at the time. Probably more.”“And now I don’t know what to do. I promised you I would treat Lionel fairly but if I feel like that over something so simple, well, I don’t know if I can carry on, or even if I should. And, I suppose, I surprised myself. I could never have thought that I would get pleasure out of something like that, of having him helpless and sobbing from being punished by me. Even if he did deserve it, should I have enjoyed it?”“I’m not sure. She and Denise had studied this before in great depth. The psychology of dominance and submission. The interplay of male and female. There was very likely a genetic predisposition toward both arousal and compliance with an alpha male during times of possessive carnal sex. For the male it was not just a possession thing. It was a display of power and strength for benefit of his own ego and psyche as well as that of whatever female he was dominating in bed. For the woman it was a sense of unbridled raw intimacy on a very primitive and carnal level. Being controlled and possessed was almost an emotional correspondence to genetic markers for love and commitment. Being claimed. Being a part of a very primal relationship. Whatever it lacked in tenderness and romance it made up for in passion and unspoken bonding that transcended words. That’s why so many women were stimulated by forced or lustful situations involving a highly sexual and demanding or controlling male partner. Of course.
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