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Adding, without thinking, “Why don’t you come in?” As I spoke, I wanted the earth to open up. Here I was, sporting male attire but with bumps where they ought not to be, and I had just invited this new neighbour into my home. “Thanks,” he said, responding rather too quickly for my liking. “I’m William – but call be ‘Bill’”. “Bill,” I responded. “My name’s Paul.” He looked even more attentively at my bulges, and calmly asked, “Paul, eh? But what do I call you?” My face felt as though it was sunburned – but I don’t think that was the focus of his attention. “Sorry,” he said. “If I can have a little milk, perhaps I can call back later - when you’re more prepared for visitors.” “Yes,” I said, getting some milk from the fridge and handing it to him, “that would be nice.” What was I saying? What was he thinking? “Thank you.” he said, with a wry grin on his face. “Well, Paul, I’ll see you later.” He spoke my name as if questioning it. He made his way to the front door, turning as he left to. I know!" He whispered something to the tattooist, who began his work. Riley crunched his chin on his chest, the valley between his pecs and abs giving him a bird-eye view of the action. He watched with horror as the tattooist began drawing a triangular wedge of swiss cheese in perspective, floating two inches above his cockroot. When he was done, they looked at it a while, before adding some features - wafting clouds rising up, a pool of liquid below - that made the cheese into a stinking cheese. Still unsatisfied, the tattooist added a big mousetrap below the cheese, with a nasty looking iron spike sticking through the top. The lines of the mousetrap ran down the sides of his meat, so his whole junk was enclosed in square lines of the board and steel trap. The pain of the lines tattooed across his perenium was excruciating, and never went below a dull throb. Riley couldn't see, but the final touch was another sharp rusty hook tattooed directly below his ballbag, holding the.
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