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"I thought she was talking about my paintings. She hadn't been in here for months since we separated. I hadn't interested her at all. I had a habit of matting and hanging work that I really liked, and when we separated, already had one wall and a big portion of a second filled with stuff I was proud of. Since the separation, I had done several larger pieces, including one of Jeffy hitting a baseball that had captured his bubbling spirit incredibly well. I thought she was referring to it, as that's where her eyes were cast."It sounded amazing, and I can't believe I caused you that much pain, and didn't even realize you were hurting like that."I didn't understand what she was talking about. I couldn't respond. She lingered, eyes still fixed to Jeffy's perfect swing."Your song. It was about me. It was about you, and how I hurt you. It was about how you'd go without me, never letting me know."Her shoulders betrayed the silent sob."Is it true?"Apparently she had heard the song when I. .. without asking me.Without thinking of me. Without thinking of our marriage. How couldyou be so thoughtless?" I'm sorry, Sandy, it just seemed to happen. Month after month Ievolved I guess from what I was to what I am. It came to a head when mymanagement called me in and asked my intentions. I... just... told themthat I was in transition. Their response was so encouraging that I wasrelieved and also felt trapped by my own words." Well, you go right ahead and do your thing -- do your SRS -- we'll copesomehow. I love you. We'll survive."The OperationAfter consulting with my employer, I started dressing full time. Mysales position worked out well. I did well as a woman, still using thename Julie. Sandy seemed to accept my new persona but our sex lifediminished to almost nothing.I continued with my regimen continuing toward womanhood, finally makingarrangements for SRS. I went to Thailand for cost reasons and returneda few months later. Recovery was slow and painful,.
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