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Mel didn't know about the problems Cathy and I were having regarding sex, but she did notice when Cathy quit her job and just stayed home. She would go to bed about nine or ten in the evening and then sleep the clock around. She would get up, eat a meal and then read a book and/or watch TV. She ate all the time and she gained almost ninety pounds over the next few years and she just looked like hell. Her shiny hair now looked terrible, yeah it was clean about every three days, but her hair had no luster anymore. Then she cut it short and started wearing house dresses like a muumuu or a robe all day. She didn't even cook anymore. I did the cooking for suppers and Mel had to make her own breakfast, if she wanted to eat. I tried talking to Cathy, but I got nowhere, she just wouldn't talk to me or she would say, "Everything is fine, now leave me alone."To make a long sad story short, after four more years of this hell, I found an outlet for my frustrations. Mel had graduated high school,. I was damned if I'd let the arrogant, selfish fool goad me into what I would consider a sacrilege, to fight on the church steps right after her funeral services were over. He yelled foul names at my back and I kept walking away from him.I walked the whole four miles back to my house, my eyes burned and my throat ached as the hurt inside refused to go away or even diminish. She was gone forever now and I'd have to get over it. Self-torture over the might have been things of this world isn't my way of coping.Peg, my old terrier walked stiffly out of the yard to greet me as I approached. I scooped her up in my arms and told her sadly, "She's gone, old girl, Sarah is gone."Peg let out a "woof" and struggled to get down when she heard Sarah's name. I sat her back down on the sidewalk and watched as she futilely looked for our Sarah. Finally, she whined her disappointment and followed me on her arthritic old legs back toward the house. I was tired to the depths of my soul, as I let myself.
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