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I made fun of homos, spicks, spooks and chinks,and my mysogynist raving always raised quite a stink!And when some bleeding heart took exception to me,I sneered in disgust and I called him PC.My life was a playland of thoughtless bombastwith no consequences, that I thought would last.But the night that the Rutger's girls played Tennessee.Everyone suddenly came after me!Maybe my comments pushed the limits a bit;but tell me those home girls weren't skanky as shit!The girl's basketball coach wanted my head on a pike,Well what can you expect from a man-hating dyke?"Suspended? You're kidding! Now come on here, folks;You know how I am! Can't these coons take a joke?"Then when bigmouth Al Sharpton waded into the fray,I needed a drink in a serious way.I saw nothing amiss when approached in that bar;It's just one of my perks as a media star.She was young black and smart, she praised my keen wit,her journalism class all thought I was hot shit.She apologized for the overreactionof a certain. On this particular Sunday morning, however, all I was thinking about was beating my three buddies in eighteen holes of golf. I was on my way to join them at our seven a.m. tee time when I absentmindedly made a wrong turn. I didn't know it the time, but that wrong turn would change my entire life.My new convertible was only a month old and this was the first day I was able to drive with the top down. With the wind in my hair and the first tee waiting, I was enjoying my leisurely drive and didn't realize my error in navigation until I was a couple miles down the wrong road.Dang it, I said to myself, get your head out of the clouds and watch what you're doing, Brent. I turned left into the first driveway I came to so I could back out and go back the way I came. As I pulled in I noticed the cutest little cape cod style house in front of me.A quick scan of the shabby looking yard told me the place was probably empty. What a shame, I thought. I put the car in reverse and tuned my head to.
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