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The first day I saw nothing. The second day I saw nothing. But on the third day when I came home, the whole house was spotless and in the pantry the shelves were filled with groceries.”The man from Canada sat up straight on the bar stool, pushed out his chest and said: “I gave my wife a stern look and told her that from now on she would have to do all the cooking, the shopping and the housecleaning. Well the first day I saw nothing. The second day I still saw nothing. But on the third day, I began to see a little bit out of my left eye.”Canada ... Home of the Free!TRANSLATING WOMEN’S ENGLISHYes = NoNo = YesMaybe = NoWe need = I wantI’m sorry = You’ll be sorryWe need to talk = I need to complainSure, go ahead = I don’t want you toIs my bum fat? = Tell me I’m beautifulDo what you want = You’ll pay for this laterI’m not upset = Of course I’m upset, you moron!Are you listening to me? = Too late, you’re deadYou have to learn to communicate = Just agree with meBe romantic, turn out the. Phyllis waved off his apologies. “I’ve heard tell of such things, Ed. It’s not a shock.” She smiled at him as if she were a teacher comforting a wayward student, but in truth, the student teacher dynamic was flipped. “I’m amazed,” she admitted candidly, “that people find that type of activity to be stimulating.” “It happens,” he confirmed. “Can I completely take off my HR hat, Ed? I really want to ask something that is even farther out of line than our conversation so far,” she asked. He shrugged so she asked, “Do you get turned on by spanking?” “I did when filming,” he reiterated and then added, “I apparently have a few fans, too. I’ve hooked up with one or two and let them spank me. It’s kind of exciting, but I sort of thought that it was only because of the notoriety of the film … or that it was simply because it was a ‘naughty’ thing to do.” Her eyes now ablaze with interest, Phyllis continued her probing. “What about the women? Did it do something for them?” Ed rolled his.
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