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RIMMER: Listen, Lister. All this tension between us is stupid. There'sjust no need for it. I mean, you're tense, and I'm tense, and there'sjust absolutely no need for it.LISTER: (Chowing down with his cake and a can of beer) I'm not tense.RIMMER: Of course you're tense, you rectum-faced pygmy! (Recovering hiscomposure) Sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I mean, there's noneed for you to be slogging your guts out.LISTER: I'm enjoying it.RIMMER: Shut up! Doing an exam, and doing so well. There's absolutely noneed for it, Lister. You can have the cigarettes, they're in pipeline22.LISTER: (Holding up a pack) I know.RIMMER: Good. The Cat betrayed me. I don't mind. I'm delighted. (Hedoesn't look it.) What I'm saying, Lister, is there's no need for us tobe at loggerheads. I mean we're mates. We're pals.LISTER: Since when?RIMMER: Oh, come on, Lister! Laugh, laugh, laugh, chuckle, guffaw,giggle! That's Rimsy and Listy!LISTER: When?RIMMER: Millions of times!LISTER: *When*?RIMMER: (Pauses. She'd been upset over missing work the day before, and felt good enough to go in, so she'd showered early and took off while I was showering. I heard her as she left, hollering at me to have a great day.I wondered who would be in my neighbor's backyard today while nobody was home. I was sure now that Gloria was nothing but a slut and it was hard telling who all she was fucking. I briefly wondered about Jim. Did he have any clue whatsoever about Gloria?Again my day was taken up with 'the project' and worrying about what I should do with my knowledge. In the end I started up a conversation with a buddy."Hey, you ever know anybody who was married and cheating on their spouse? I mean, did you know when the other spouse might not have?" Oh man. Yeah. That was a nightmare. I knew this couple a few years back. Good people. He was fucking around on her. I saw him with his little honey one night while his wife was home tending to a sick kid. I knew that he had told her he had to work on a.
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